my complicated life

it's been awhile since i had a heavy cry... ewan ko ba, affected talaga ako. though i tried so hard to hope for the best things, the reality always sips in and tries to snatch my hope away. so, i slept last night with a heavy heart... i know, there's no one else to blame but me. am i being so makulit??? trying to convince myself that things will get better?? that there is hope??? eh, parang wala na talaga. i'll just cry some more and perhaps things may or may not get better, but then it will all be clearer. =(

along with this sad feeling, is the fact that the vacation that i definitely need will not push through. i really can't go without an approval. well, i could send an email to the director (that is, if he manages to check his mails), but then this means a bad impression on me. so, huwag na lang. i don't wanna lose face when they come back. anyway, i have tons of work to do. in the contrary, this means, i will not be as harrassed as i am come fall semester because i will be done with all my assignments. cge na nga, accepted ko nang wala akong vacation this year. anyway, based from the academic calendar, there's gonna be a 3-wk semestral break on January 2006. i might be taking that chance to go in a vacation instead. it will be a better climate in HK by then, plus Disney will be open by that time. hmmm... nice idea...

i already sent my vacation money to the philippines. they need it more than i do. okay lang. it's a good daughter's obligation naman....

i did favors for two great friends of mine today, Fe and Lea... i hope, they get their peace of mind as well...

wala akong appetite today. i just had a quick breakfast and had M&M and clover chips for lunch. =(